The Secret of My Success
Exploring what it means to live a fulfilling life!
If you have ever tried to improve yourself and your life by taking a seminar, going to a meeting, or joining a club but failed to get the results you thought you wanted or thought you needed, I'm here to tell you that you are not alone.
Join me as I talk with people I have met on my journey and we explore what worked and what didn't
The Secret of My Success
Life is a Journey - Sabrina Fajardo (#002)
In a vibrant, multi-cultural environment, Sabrina's art journey began. From a young age, she found solace and joy in creative expressions. Influenced by diverse sources, she became a skilled designer, brand creator, illustrator, and painter. Her work is more than talent; it's a personal healing and growth process. This soulful approach connects deeply with clients, manifesting their dreams. Each project reinforces her commitment to enrich lives, one soulful creation at a time.
Sabrina and I talk about learning to be more present in the now and the importance of playfulness and curiosity.
#explore #dowhatyoulove #betruetoyourself
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Hello and welcome to The Secret of My Success. This is a Podcast where we explore what it means to live a fulfilling life. I am your host. Erin Currin, I am joined today by Sabrina Fajardo. Just to give you a little bit of a snapshot about who she is, in a vibrant, multicultural environment, Sabrina's journey with art began from a young age. She found solace and happiness in a world of artistic expression. A myriad of artistic influences have shaped her creativity into something truly unique and intense, leading her to become a talented designer, a visual brand creator, a book illustrator and a gifted painter. You can see some of her paintings in the background. Her work transcended mere talent or skill. It's a deep personal experience, an avenue for self healing and for growth. This journey has allowed her to refine her artistry and discover a process infused with soulfulness and depth, allowing deep connections with clients, understanding their visions and helping them manifest their dreams. Each project she undertakes reinforces her commitment to enriching lives one soulful creation at a time. Sabrina, welcome. Thank you for joining us today.
Sabrina Fajardo:Thank you for inviting me. I'm excited.
Erin Currin:I am too. One of the reasons why I'm excited is part of your artistic expression comes through in the cover of my book. Hate Your Way to Happiness, so I it's been a joy to work with you over the years, because I really it's been fun to know how much time and energy you invest in really getting to know your clients. So, thank you for that.
Sabrina Fajardo:I truly enjoy that part of the work that I do, whether it's for a brand or it's for a piece of art, or your cover of your book, I did your logo years ago too.
Erin Currin:Yes, yeah, I actually still have the that logo on my business cards for the unmistakable entrepreneur. That's awesome. Well, it's like all of your work is so playful, I mean, and colorful, like what we see on the wall behind you, and it's just you. You are that vibrant person. It's like your art is truly a reflection of you.
Sabrina Fajardo:I definitely that's me when I'm when I'm in, in my in my best, and I can see now the difference, and it's kind of a guidance point for me to know where to go to. Because that playfulness, that playfulness, that initial playfulness that you bring as a child, has to come out in my life every day or every week, so that things flow more with more ease in my life. And that's something I'm really very clear about now, which I was not clear before. I didn't understand that, but it has come to to clarity for me that I need to put myself in those places constantly in order for me to become a creative person in every way, not only in my art and what I do as work, but in life in general, for it to flow with ease. Yeah,
Erin Currin:So that's really, I mean all that I know of you, I can see that playfulness. And what I'm what I'm hearing I think I'm hearing you say is, there are times when that playfulness has been absent or you weren't allowing it, like, how did you discover that that was something that needed to be put at the forefront?
Sabrina Fajardo:I think it has come in, in, in a process you know, you need to, you need to understand certain things in your life in order to get to the next step. Right? So I'm a, I'm a I'm an I learned through living life, through what I experience. So as time goes by, I've learned that sometimes you need to go to where you don't want to go, but you need to be there in order to bring. Clarity to what is it that you need to learn to focus on? And that's how, how my life has happened, you know, whether it's been, you know, leaving Colombia, when I, you know, decided that it was time, and then having clarity. And why was I needing to be on my own for a little bit, you know, or years ago, I was with my children, once they arrived here and we lost our home and everything. And I then realized, you know what, this is, exactly where I had to be in order to learn something. And, you know, things happen a relationship and, oh, God, what did I learn in this relationship? And I don't, I don't end relationships not hating someone, I thank them, because I learned something valuable, right? So this is a journey. This is a journey. We live this life as a journey, and I own the art journey.com. Because I'm an artist, right? And I'm an artist in every sense. I feel life as an artist. I express myself as an artist, even if I'm not painting. I think, I think, I guess that's it. I don't know, but that's what I think I do and and so this is, this is a journey, and you're in constant evolution. And when you ask for something, for something new, you sometimes don't realize that maybe you need to learn some lessons in order to get prepared for that new right?
Erin Currin:That's for sure. Like I know that sometimes in Buddhism, we say that you don't necessarily get what you want, but you will always get what you need. And it's not always fun to see that this is what I need. But on the backside, if, if I approach it with gratitude, I'm usually able to see why this particular situation served me.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yes, as I'm I moved last year, a year and a half ago to Central Texas from Florida, and I'm originally mostly Colombian. I was not born there, but I live most of my life in Colombia. And every time there's some some new, some something new to face, right? But not aware of that before and now, as I approach life, I'm always being curious of what why am I placed in in a certain circumstance? Why am I feeling in a certain way? What am I learning from that situation that I can be aware of, you know, and being here, there's a lot of things that I wanted which I didn't get. I totally got the opposite. Very, very interesting, and and it has opened my eyes to know exactly where I have to go to, where I have to pay put my attention to. And it doesn't come exactly from this particular experience of moving, but it's been a process, like, I say, a journey during COVID. I was, I was really focused on Child Trauma, childhood trauma, right? Yeah, I took some on that, and it was very interesting, because I started looking at my whole life from that perspective, and played that game of, you know, the the trauma over and over and over and over, and it still comes back. It doesn't go away, but you go like, now I'm able to look at it like, Oh, there you are. Who wakes you?
Erin Currin:Yeah, no, exactly. You mentioned a few minutes ago that you're starting to put the pieces together. And you know, thank you for sharing about digging in and taking a look at that trauma. Is that where you started to to get curious about the things that you had gotten and you hadn't gotten, and what the contribution was in your life.
Sabrina Fajardo:I think it has been one of the biggest and more deepest findings in my journey. Oh, sorry, yes, it was. It was very interesting when I took that, because I've taken a lot of courses, and each one has brought a new insight. In my life. But that one was particularly, particularly special, because it kind of gave me a view of my whole life, the things that affected me to even my previous, you know, my parents and what they went through and things, because I inherited a lot of that stuff, and then seeing how my life, how I live my life, how I lived relationships, how I live my relationship, with what I did with my career, how I live my relationship with art, that was important one. So after COVID, that's when I chose to move. And I chose to move because I said, You know what art has been in my life? For always I've done graphic design, yes, but art painting was something that became really hard for me, and I was unable to sit in front of a canvas and paint for a long time. I tried it. I tried it. No, for for a long time, I had been doing a lot of digital stuff, which was easier for me because I could, because it was not so physical related, it's, it's not that it's bad or anything. I love illustrating. You know, digitally, it's wonderful, but that relationship you have with a canvas is very different, right? It's a physical thing where you touch the materials, you're very in tune with that sort of the senses. And that's something that is very strong in me, and very, very sense driven, very tactile, very visual, very, you know, auditive. And I, I that's a place for me to play to. So when I discovered those things i After COVID, I said, You know what? I've put art on the last place on my list of tools, because I was very scared, and I said, I'm going to put it at the front and I'm just going to evolve through it. I'm just going to paint and evolve. I'm not going to judge it. I'm not going to, you know, I'm going to do it. And I started painting, and I did my first painting on canvas after a long time. And I had tried several times, but I never liked it, never liked the end product or anything. And I'm, I was not going to judge it or anything. And guess what, I loved it. I loved the end product, and it got me so excited. I knew this is my, this is my, my. This is really my answer. And to add to that, I made a post the other day about it, maybe in 2015 I got a download, okay, a mess. And the message was, the day you start doing art, your life, your abundance, will change. Oh, and I tried and disregarded and tried and disregarded and tried and disregarded. You know, of course, a journey, right?
Erin Currin:You've gotta decide to try it your own way. It can't be that way.
Sabrina Fajardo:No, it is such an important thing in my life, and it's still this year for me, this past 2023 was a year to really see a lot of that happening. Yeah, but the boat, the contrast, the contrast, yes, I saw myself because I had a solo exhibit, my first solo exhibit in my life, and it came like, Dude, it just it came out of nowhere. Oh, wow. It was magic, and it was wonderful. How much can you? Can you bring into reality from feeling that happiness, from, you know, feeling in your, in your in what you're meant to do, right?
Erin Currin:Well, I think one of the the big things is kind of like you're saying. It's like you've had this, you. Feeling this desire inside of you for so long. You're like, I'll get to it later, someday I'll be ready. You know, it sounds good, but I just really I don't want to go there and relive that uncomfort, that discomfort. I don't want to go to that place, and once you do, it might be a little bit uncomfortable at first, but it's like, I also imagine that there were, because you said, during COVID, you worked on the childhood trauma, you worked on some of the different deeper issues and concerns. Do you how do you feel that that aspect played into really birthing your art.
Sabrina Fajardo:It's not only about the art, it's about life in general. I think it helped me bring the ability to look at myself from the kind of from the outside of when I'm going through things right now, am I please? Why am I going through this? What can I learn from it? Because the that richness of the situation, right that the that possibility of learning something new, I'm very curious. When I am in in places, because it happens, you know, on and off. You know, one day I'm in a great place, and then maybe the next day I'm not. But curiosity is, why am I here? Right? What am I going through this? You know, what can I learn from this situation I'm feeling right now, and it's uncomfortable, and maybe I want to cry. Maybe I'll cry, you know, I'll let myself I maybe I'll let myself express my my my feelings right now and and go through it so I can get to another place. And I think that's part of a big, big experience in 2023 for me. Yeah, both, both the con, like I said, the contrast being there. I even got sick last year, yeah, and as I was at the hospital back in March, that first day, I received a message, and I said, You're detoxifying. That was a message I got. Okay, not very nice to detoxify this way, but okay. It was..
Erin Currin:Well, if you're, if you're not going to actively do it yourself, we'll help you out.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yeah, exactly, but it was very clear for me that I needed to go through certain things that I had to learn in order to get to where I had put myself or plan to put myself into. You know, I moved here. I wanted to be around my daughter that lives here, and meet a community and blah, blah, blah, all these things that I thought before I was not getting. Mm, hmm. And guess what? I get sick. My son got sick. I was away from community a lot, but feeling lonely, right? And, you know, it taught me that I'm again. What how people say, you know, you have to feel it and really experience it, feeling the loneliness. Am I really lonely? Or is it? Is it just me feeling it? I had to that process, because that had been one of my traumas in life, right? My dad died when I was a child. You know, all these different things that happen in life. So being in a new place with people that are very different, I'm, I'm, I come from Colombia, and I'm in Texas, in Central Texas, in a place that's, I would say, very different from me. And how can, yeah, very different from me, and then looking at myself and thinking, Okay, so is this? Is this my judgment of myself in a different place? How can I look at this in a different way? So part of right? And that has been something that also happened, was triggered to me, for me during COVID, because of all the things that were going on during COVID, how can I become part of this world in a different. Way. So, yeah, it's been a very interesting process for me, also coming back to that sense sensitive person, right? And learning, for me, that this new year is going to be a lot about playing. Yeah, a lot, lot about playing. Last year I didn't play enough, but I know that the times when I put myself in play mode, like going for walks, I take my phone and I take pictures of little things that happen around that you normally don't pay attention to, like a little leaf. The other day I was walking, and it was, the ground was kind of frozen a little bit, yeah, and I see the design on the edges of of some leaves on the ground and some kind of flowers. And there were eyes, like a design, like a beautiful design. So I walk and I go like, surprise me, surprise me, universe with something, you know, something. So I walk and I'm paying attention, which led me to to understand that, that that has always been my original Sabrina as a child. Mm, that curiosity, that curiosity which makes us have fun and have joy in life, have connection to the world and have connection to people. When I go out and meet someone for coffee, I go with that same sense, you know, curious, what is the world going to surprise me with today? You know, in this conversation, and it normally happens in such a magical way,
Erin Currin:How did you... How did you wake yourself up to this curiosity? Because I I'm hearing in your experience that we started out with life doesn't always give you what you want, but it always gives you what you need. And you weren't accomplishing what you felt like you wanted to accomplish, but then you know you were still doing art, but it wasn't as connected and is tactile and is fully expressed, as I feel like, I mean, it's obvious, because you can see it on the wall behind you. You've you've shifted from not connecting to seeking connection. How would you say you made that transition?
Sabrina Fajardo:I thought I was connecting before. That's a funny thing, right? But because of that, I think I had to see the disconnection and then figure out that the original me was so connected, and we forget that as children, we are and that we don't we don't question so much, we don't judge so much. We don't judge ourselves. We think we're right. We play a lot. We play a lot. And I think that life has to be like that. We need to play every day. We need to be curious and have a very light perspective, perspective about life and the people that we meet in order to come back and be able to be productive in whatever we do. I notice that the difference a big difference when I go out and I connect to people, I connect to nature. My son has been volunteering at a farm. When I go back there, I took some pictures the other day because I was talking to all the animals that that connection to what's alive around you is so nurturing. Really. It is so and so and so easy, and it's so beautiful. And then I come back and I'm fulfilled. I'm filled with love. I'm filled with creativity and thoughts and downloads and things. And I can sit and be more productive, but if I stay here at home thinking, Oh, I have to do this. I have to design this. Oh, I have to blah, blah, blah, oh, I have to pay the pay this or something like that, right, right? They. Completely stuck. So that, for me, is the answer. I have to go play and then come back and be productive. And by being in a place where I was not playing at all, just stuck at home, you know, even being sick, I had little glimpses of that. Because what I did when I was in bed here at home is that I started taking out smaller canvases, putting them on my bed with everything around me.
Erin Currin:oh, wow,
Sabrina Fajardo:and painting, because that's that's where my the way I could start healing started, I realized. So it comes a little glimpses, and then you forget, and you go back home. Yeah. So that's why I I put myself in positions. I go out and I walk and I take my phone and I purposely, purposely move myself to that playful mode.
Erin Currin:that's really powerful because, like, what I I hear you saying is that it's something that happens So naturally and effortlessly that it's really easy to miss, and all of a sudden we're in this dark cave, this space where there is no life, and we feel empty and we feel gray and down. And then, if I can remind myself when I am feeling that color and that play and that curiosity, to wake up and turn around and take a quick look, what was it that I just did that fulfilled me? And how can I purposefully and intentionally add this into my life, if for no other reason than in that moment. It feels good. But what we hear in all of the personal development courses and spirituality is it's like this is the wellspring, but we're so asleep as we go through life, distracted by bills, distracted by responsibilities and dramas and fights and arguments and all of this silly little stuff that it eventually just gets covered over. Those tiny moments of light are essential and and what I hear is you've learned, you've trained yourself to intentionally focus on those to reawaken that playful spirit.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yes, and it's a it's such a powerful tool to manifest, because, of course, we're talking about vibration, right, right? No wonder I do things with such amount of color. Even photographs, if I do photographs and they're in in black and white, they're intense. They're intense in in in contrast, and things I love black and white, my ex husband was, is a photographer, and I learned to love black and white and intensity, the beauty of right? And so there's, there's intensity that something that makes you feel right? Um, so what I was, I was, uh, well, you were talking about, I was thinking, how can we manifest through through playing and art is a playful place. Yes, for even if you're not, if you don't consider yourself an artist, I'm not a singer. I like singing. I don't have a terrible voice, but I don't have an educated voice, and I've learned that when I sing, and I'm singing with with love, not me, but with love within it, and you and I set the intention, I vibrate in such a high place. I'm connecting like, when I'm painting, I'm connecting the same thing when I'm dance, dancing, if I let myself, you know, with my my hair, and I don't feel so so like, oh, people are looking at me. I even dance with ice when I go to places to dance. I put my eyes closed. Yeah, you have to, but I just try to express myself with my body and and because that's playfulness, that is where I my. Myself with the ability to to express, to let that come out, you know, and just be self expression is something that's very, very important for me. I I never gave myself permission before without judgment. Would not sing because I thought every everyone would judge me. So if I sang in public, my voice would crumble in pieces. I couldn't come out well, I couldn't speak in public. Oh, much less horrible, horrible. So doing something like what we're doing right now? Nope. No.
Erin Currin:Well, thank you for being brave and courageous and agreeing to to be on this podcast.
Sabrina Fajardo:It is a wonderful thing because it self expression is part of that playfulness.
Erin Currin:It absolutely is. And I think what you were pointing to a little bit ago is, even if you don't consider yourself an artist, find a way to express it's I love painting ceramics. I love, you know, the adult coloring books, not the adult coloring books, but like, you know, the grown up patterned coloring books, because it's like I always go to art supply stores and I'm buying pencils and I'm buying oil crayon, pastels and all of this stuff. And with a coloring book, I don't have to worry about whether I am creating a Monet. I can just take this palette of colors with this drawing that like attracts me. I flip through the book, I find something that calls to my spirit in that moment, and then I just use whatever colors feel good, and that's my way to express and you know, with the ceramics, it's kind of the same thing. It's I pick up something that already sort of has a shape and a pattern in my mind, and then I just fill in the blanks with that. And it's almost like I'm teaching myself, but really it's allowing myself low.
Sabrina Fajardo:One thing I learned early on is that sometimes we gotta, we wanted to. We want to structure it so much. One gift got from my parents was they didn't put me in art classes until I was like, 15 years old my mom, because my dad was not there anymore, but my mom always said, I want you to express yourself the way that you want to express yourself on the way you see the world, right? And I don't want anyone to tell you how to paint a tree or paint a person until you're ready to to do it with your own expression, and then you can learn how to do it technically in order to have more, more of an ability To to, you know, destroy it or build it or whatever along the way, because I had no ability to do that before, but I had a wild imagination, yeah, right, and they loved it. My parents were like, I'm so thankful for that, because many, many people are born into families that if they say, you I'm going to be an artist, you know, no, and they have to fight with that No. For me, it was the opposite. I was in art school, and I told my mom, I'm going to study graphic design, because I did a whole year of both, yeah, and cried. She cried because she wanted me to just study art. And I think she was very wise. She was very wise.
Erin Currin:She could see you before you could see you. Sounds,
Sabrina Fajardo:Definitely. That was interesting. But you know what I chose graphic design, and it has been great in so many ways, because it brought so much knowledge and so many abilities to do so many things that are part of being it's, it's, it's being an artist, only that you're doing something for something specifically Communication, but when you're doing art, it's more for you, and maybe for some for other people there, but it's more. It's a very different um approach, so, but it's still art, it's still art.
Erin Currin:It's a very personal journey, yeah,
Sabrina Fajardo:yeah. It's more important,
Erin Currin:because I. I think what you were pointing to a few minutes ago, it's how you're viewing the world. Because really, at the end of the day, how we view the world is what determines how the journey goes right. And at a very basic level, artistic expression, how free your artistic expression is is, is sort of like a window into the soul of how free, how freely you view the world, and how open you are. If everything has to be in a particular way, if, if a box is all you have, then a box is all you will ever have, right when you can really open up beyond the edges of that box and expand into true possibility, and you can take those walls down, then you can create beyond what you think you know is possible.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yes, exactly. And art, art gives you the opportunity to see where you are. Also, I think I here. I did an exercise the other day with a friend lady, and we were talking about feelings, right? Yeah, and I was going through some troubles that day, and we did an exercise. I don't know if you can see it. So this was about being afraid, and that's how I felt exactly. I just let myself express my my fear. There, and because we were doing an exercise about the past, and then this one was being angry. How does angry feel? What colors and the things that come up when you just let yourself express this one was about being sad, oh, wow, not like that. And this one was about being frustrated, wow. So after that I was feeling so good, yeah, but I let so much out through that exercise, and those are the things that I let myself do often, because it's just, it just is a vehicle to to bring it out. And I've learned about using art as not only a way to manifest things, but a way to really heal a lot of your emotional stuff and let go through it and then build from that through art too. I've used a lot of my illustrations for manifesting, yeah, specifically, and I'm using the painting so I'm adding in some of them, not these, but symbolism, but in my illustrations, like the one, maybe you see the trees that are like a couple and those, those illustrations I made for manifesting, so they got a lot of symbolism for manifesting. But I'm finding out every day more and more things, how can we exercise, how can we exercise our emotions to to figure out ways to manifesting things. So I'm learning things that I'm going to probably soon this year, be sharing with other people to help them, help people deal with emotions and then guide them to manifest things.
Erin Currin:It's really kind of, yeah, well, and that brings to mind, like vision boarding. So many people will try to do vision boarding, and I know when I first started doing vision boarding years ago, it's cutting out a bunch of words because the pictures never really fit quite right. And I've gotten to the point where I started to expand my horizons by just letting myself pick images with colors or images that struck me in a particular way, and I played a game one time where I created an entire two by three poster board with Nothing but images. I think there were two words down at the bottom in the center that I added, and it was such a fascinating exercise, because, as you know human beings, we communicate with words. But the truth of the matter is, what is it? Maybe, you know it's like only 20% of what we communicate is that. Actually the words, the rest of it is intonation, body language, you know, inflection, all of these different things. The words themselves are a small fraction, but we pretend like it's the totality. I can use a particular word in many different ways. My most favorite, four letter F bomb can be used to express excitement. Can be used to express frustration, anger, joy, so many different and it's the same, the same vehicle. So I love what you're saying. As far as like you've taken vision boards now to an Uber personal level by expressing it with your paints and with your canvas. That's that's just brilliant, absolutely brilliant.
Sabrina Fajardo:You infuse, you, infuse the work with with the feeling, because that's a thing, the feeling I have a great capacity to visualize, which not many people have I learned that not everyone thinks in images, right? I used to think that everyone did before, but the ability to visualize myself in a feeling that is a that is a really cool thing. I was doing some meditations a couple months ago from Joe Dispenza, yeah, where he gives you words. How does it feel to be blah, blah, blah. And the only thing that comes to me is I visualize myself in that feeling. Mm, so you know, how does it feel to be alive? And I visualize myself alive, what would I be doing in that moment, and I feel it in such a strong way. Or, how does you feel to be very strong. Or what is it? Yeah, something like strong. I visualize myself, you know, pushing something and non stopping. But it's that visualizing thing, that image thing, it's so important for me. It's the feeling. So a vision board, a vision board can't be only words. It has to be something that that sparks that feeling inside. It's such an important thing, and you must give yourself a permission when you have the vision board to use it constantly to feel.
Erin Currin:And I think something that you alluded to earlier is really key, because you're a very visual person. I'm a very auditory person, so for me, words are highly valuable, and it was definitely coming through in my vision boards. But one of the things that you had pointed to earlier is that judgment, fear of judgment from people who are going to see the vision board. If you're taking a vision board class, people are going to judge how you did it and how you put it together. But then there's also this self regulation of the oh, I shouldn't want this or I shouldn't do it this way. I mean, really, I think that as much as the exercise for me to create a vision board with nothing but images was powerful if I let that stop me, if I said you're not allowed to use words, and it's my first few times anything that is going to limit me from exploring That, I think would be part of that judgment. And it's, you know, if we're talking about the journey, one of, one of the most valuable things that I've I've learned through my process, and I know you and I have swam in some of the same personal development kinds of circles, is if it looked like it had to be a certain way, I am fantastic at mimicking all day long, but I would never really get to the lesson, to the to the heart of what needed to be gotten, because I felt like I had to mimic and copy based on somebody else's judgment, their experience, their assessment or opinion. And one of the things that I've really come to terms with, to learn to let go of, is is the box that that that judgment puts me in. Most of the time, it's just me being embarrassed to express the way I express so I think that that that freedom to play and that freedom to express a lot of the discomfort that comes when we start. Art to go into those places the discomfort is from the judgment. And I love what you were saying about really bringing awareness to what is the lesson here? What what is going on in my life, and what is my life trying to point me toward the difference between doing your art digitally and doing it in a very media rich way. I almost see that evolution from your digital art over to your tactile art as being you taking that Governor off and really expressing yourself fully, and in my opinion, deliciously.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yeah, yeah. We we take away the delicious because ourselves too much, and the delicious can go in so many ways, but we judge ourselves so much during our life experience, we think that we're judged. That's a funny thing. And sometimes we're judging others because we think that they're judging us. It's like, it's a game we play, like, oh, this person did or is thinking about that, and it's just us putting the judgment on them to that they judge us, and it's all about us, and that's always a good place to to look into. You know, why am I seeing why am I seeing this person act that way sometimes?
Erin Currin:Yes. Why do I feel like I want to jump in and correct her right now because she said it that way. Or why do I feel the need to even bother telling him that I'm going to do it differently? Because he really doesn't give two craps about how I'm going to be expressing myself.
Sabrina Fajardo:It's their experience. Yes, they're, they're going through their own experience. No matter what they tell you, it's all about me. Yep, no, what I get from sometimes I have, you know, some arguments with my daughter, who kind of, sometimes it's a little bit controlling and and then I go, like, Okay, why? Am I seeing that in her? Seeing that in her. Why am I feeling this? What is it about me? Who am I being right now? How am I feeling? What am I going through? Mm hmm, seeing that in her, right? Because it's not about anyone else but me, my journey. I choose how to how to live it.
Erin Currin:It certainly feels like it's a person. But you know, we've alluded a little bit to the law of attraction and and contrast, and one of the, one of the things that Abraham Hicks often says is, there is no law of assertion. It is only law of attraction. I can't push that noodle where I think I want it to go. So whatever is coming my way is only and always, because this is how I view whatever it is that's going on, and if I truly am interested in experiencing some sort of a shift around this particular topic or aspect of my life, I get to look right here
Sabrina Fajardo:exactly. It's my life. It's my experience, and how I see it is from my eyes.
Erin Currin:That sounds so... You know, based on what we're taught in in Western culture and civilization, it sounds so confusing and it sounds so selfish, but the truth of the matter is, I can only see the world through my experience and through my view. And one of the other things that I think is really brilliant that they share is, oh, so you don't want me to be living life according to how I view the world. You would prefer I view life according to how you view the world and when I look at it from that kind of a perspective, then it's just completely ridiculous, because then I turn it around and go, Oh, well, I'm angry with that person for how they drive, and it's because I want them to conform to my set structure and how I think things should be done. So How ridiculous is that? Being true selfishness is trying to demand somebody else conform to whatever story I made up for the day.
Sabrina Fajardo:Exactly. Yeah, it is very funny when you start looking at that and you go like, Huh. That is fun, instead of becoming so. So, like, we tend to be all drama queens. Oh, you know. Right?
Erin Currin:I have no idea what you're talking about.
Sabrina Fajardo:And then when we just turn it around and see it with that perspective, it becomes funny. It can, yes, become really funny. And you go like, Oh, my God, I'm just being in my drama place today, and, you know, not letting you know, not letting people be who they are, and just, you know, it just changes the perspective for me, because I love humor. Mm hmm, it just becomes a little funny. And I look at myself sometimes when I'm playing that game of a victim, you know, yeah, there you go, Sabrina. Ridiculous. That is, that is funny. But you know, I've, I've learned to be to let it become lighter and lighter. Just have more compassion to my for myself. You know, if I'm in there at that time, that day, it's okay. Next day is another day. I'll have fun next day.
Erin Currin:Absolutely I love that there's always another day.
Sabrina Fajardo:It's like, I used to tell my my kids, you know, oh, what they would tell me, oh, I want to be on vacation all the time. Like, oh, like, yeah, you wouldn't like the vacation all the time, because then you wouldn't know what vacation is. You need to have the time for, you know, school and no vacation in order to know and enjoy how vacation is. So we like they, like Abraham says, or, you know, people that channel we we learn from that contrast, if we were not feeling too good, the next day is a possibility, right? How can we purposely work it, to get there by being more aware of us ourselves, this journey of loving everything in us, right? Little detail, the things that we kind of the judgment of ourselves. Love it too. You go like, Oh God, there you go, judging yourself. Make it a little more fun. Make it a little more light. I think that that's the point. You know,
Erin Currin:sometimes it's fun to go to a break room and break stuff.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yes, it can be.
Erin Currin:Sometimes it's fun to just That's why I was often sing a heavy metal song at the top of your lungs as you're driving through traffic. Yes, you
Sabrina Fajardo:it wasn't fun exercises. Exercise because I got to express it through something else, dancing. You know, that's, that's, again, why I say art expressions, different ones are so much life changing, because you get to just let it, let it out. Yeah, like you said, some, put some heavy metal and just jump and bang your head and go nuts or yell or whatever,
Erin Currin:you get to let it out without killing someone and ending up in jail.
Sabrina Fajardo:yes, and that's that way. That's where I go to, you know, looking at at humanity and thinking about, why do people go to these places? What happens? And for me, it's one of the commitments I've made in life, is to to learn to be very compassionate. Compassion, for me, is such an important thing, and sometimes people, not many understand that word really. They think that compassion is like permission or, you know, let them do whatever they want to do, being responsible for your life and understanding other people's life journey when they're not being responsible, I guess.
Erin Currin:Oh, I think, um, you know, one of the things that comes up is, uh, an expression that I've heard is ruthless compassion. To be able to truly be compassionate towards somebody, sometimes means to lay down the law. It to stop enabling it means to reflect back, to allow someone to experience the effects of the causes that they've made.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yes. I always explain when people ask me, you know when they got confused. I said, compassion is not permission.
Erin Currin:That's a brilliant way to state it, yes,
Sabrina Fajardo:yeah. But for me, it has. It has really let me look at myself that way, and when I look at myself that way, I can, I can look at humanity and. What has been going on, the things that affected me or didn't affect me, but affect others with those days, and it softens, softens the feeling. It softens the journey that we all are living as a whole, right? And starts that process of healing. Yes, I think it's such an important thing. I've done it. My mom was Polish. She, you know, Jewish. I found out I'm Jewish after, you know, died so many things in my past, and then, you know, understanding the the trauma that happened in her life, that affected me too, as a as a community, right? And take responsibility on starting to look at at the things that affected that and the people, and starting to dig into why those people became that way for me, such a it gave me so much freedom in my heart to stop pointing out I lived in Colombia, you know, most of my life in a country that had so much Violence and things going on. And it was hard. It was hard. A lot of trauma from that too. Start going there. Why do people inherit that right? Where does that come from? How has that been going on for centuries and centuries and centuries? And we inherit all of us, all of us, because we are all part of it, right? Yeah, through COVID, I questioned a lot of those things, because there was all this war words and pointing fingers. And you got the you got the the vaccine you didn't get it, you know, you're wrong. You're wrong. What is wrong? You're white, you're black, you're yellow, you're red. All of that, you know, all of this. I questioned everything. I put myself in a place where I even told my How have I have How have I made part of any of these in my past, where I lived, where, you know, what group I was in, if I had made part in just a minimal and in a minimal thought or something, right? Because we're all responsible, so we need to look at ourselves also with, with that compassion and that responsibility of, how can we change this? So for me, a big chunk of it was compassion, yeah, learning, learning to look at everyone and where they are, even if they're being horrible. Why are they there? Right?
Erin Currin:Yeah, and again, like you say, just because you might be in an abusive relationship or, you know, somebody might have attacked your family or assaulted your individual being it doesn't mean permission. It doesn't mean allowing. It just means don't carry it with you for the rest of your life and hate the next 50 people because of what one person did based on how they grew up or what they suffered. It's it's the the old story of the two Buddhist monks who are walking down the banks of a river, and they've taken a vow of celibacy, not to touch a woman, and at one point they encounter a woman who's trying to cross the river, and one monk picks her up, carries her across, and then comes back across the river to join the other monk, and they walk for a couple of hours, and the second monk turns to the first and says, How could you I just can't let it be anymore. How could you have touched that women? We took a vow. And the first monk looks at him and says, I put her down two hours ago, and you're still, you're still carrying her. Um, so really like suffer what there is to suffer and enjoy, what there is to enjoy. Because it's circling back. Why am I experiencing this What is there for me to learn through this process, through this interaction, through this experience, what what is coming up for me that either tells me that there's something for me to address, or is basically just. Giving me an idea of what my preference in this kind of a situation is, right?
Sabrina Fajardo:Yeah, being being in this new place with so many people, and at first seeing it from the perspective of the other person. You know they are. What are their you know, what is their background? What is their life about? And then, then suddenly, I went like, Okay, why am I here with my own background, the differences that I, that I bring, right? Yeah, maybe sometimes even feeling fear at certain moments, right? Of course, yeah. And I go like, Huh? Why am I feeling that that is strange? Is that? Is that a trauma that I bring of not being able to survive in places? Yeah, I started really questioning every single thing about how I was looking the outside, but from me. And then I went like, wow, I'm in such a perfect place. I love it. What a beauty, you know? What a beauty to see myself different. Uh, what a beauty to see the common things in every in every person that I meet here, right?
Erin Currin:Yeah. That is wonderful. Permission to exist, judgment free,
Sabrina Fajardo:but it was all about me, because I had a big trauma of survival, mm, caring through my mom and things and and then I went like, Oh, wow. This is wonderful. This is beautiful
Erin Currin:when you can truly see that painful experience as a teacher and really develop a deep gratitude for whatever that situation is. That's when you can experience true freedom.
Sabrina Fajardo:Yeah, yeah. I think life is such an amazing journey, and we we learn to love ourselves a little more every day. Yeah, just some more. I have this, this thing that, that my thought is when the the moment, but where we love ourselves the most and when we let go of this physical, this physical body, when we just let go. I have that. Yeah, that's why I think that's what people call, that this place of celebration. And more and more people are understanding that the same that we were born and celebrated to come into this physical realm. Yeah, I celebrate that, right? Because celebrating that beautiful moment of lots of love, release, release, yeah, I think that's awesome. It's an incredible experience to be alive.
Erin Currin:Well, I'm going to suggest that we close this particular conversation on that fantastic note, because it really is fantastic to be alive. Sabrina, thank you so much for for sharing this conversation, this space, with me, and for sharing so much of your beautiful soul with us.
Sabrina Fajardo:Thank you. This was great. I loved our conversation as always.
Erin Currin:Hopefully we can do it again. So for those of you who have tuned in to our conversation, this has been the secret of my success, exploring what it means to live a fulfilling life. Please let us know what you think of the conversation. What topics would you like to hear about? Is there somebody in your life that you think would be fascinating to understand what their experience of life has been like? Let me know in the comments. Reach out through social media. I look forward to seeing you all again next time. Sabrina again. Thank you. This is Erin Currin, signing off until next time.